Blog – Page 8 – Carla Jean Whitley

This INFJ has a dirty little secret

Posted on July 14, 2014July 10, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

I’m in the process of becoming trained as a yoga teacher, and the nine-month-long training includes writing a number of papers. I’ll post them here because, well, that’s what I do. The fourth writing assignment was a reflection on a month of practicing yoga at home. Our instructor asked us to practice three days a week for at least half an hour each time. We were to move on our own, without videos, books or apps to guide us.

Set an intention for your practice. Focus on the breath. Warm up the body. Sun salutations. Standing poses. Inversions and arm balances, if I feel like changing it up. Seated poses. Cool down. Savasana.

The rhythm of a yoga practice has become comforting, whether I’m in class or on my own. There’s plenty of room for creativity within this loose pattern, but even a loose structure helps me find my way as I stretch and move around my mat.

I would have guessed that transitioning from one pose to another could be challenging, but as I’ve spent more time in home practice I’ve realized that my body and mind both know what makes sense. I’ve spent enough time in yoga classes to have some idea of what flows. Likewise, as I’ve worked to establish a home practice without any outside guidance, I’ve discovered that half an hour isn’t much time to spend in yoga. I can barely get through a standing sequence before it’s time to start winding down.

The real discovery has come off the mat: I’m undisciplined.

When I shared this revelation, my roommate was skeptical. “You’re plenty disciplined,” she said. “Or maybe you’re just more disciplined than me.”

True, I’ve got a Type-A personality. I’m able to focus and accomplish a lot, and frequently I can do so in a short timeframe. That’s precisely why I didn’t recognize my lack of discipline before. I’m able to put on blinders to isolate myself from the rest of the world and peck away at a task until I’ve accomplished what I must.

But so much of this is based on what I want to do, what’s fun to me. Writing a book qualifies. Managing my budget does not. Sleeping until my alarm rings for the third time is decadent. Climbing out of bed and onto my yoga mat doesn’t sound so tempting, at least not before I’ve had my first cup of coffee.

It’s been hard to identify the rhythms of my life and where a regular home practice fits within them. So far, that has meant an erratic schedule but satisfying yoga; even if I spend 15 minutes in supta baddha konasana followed by 15 minutes with legs up the wall, I feel peaceful and challenged. And those lessons are following me into the rest of my life, as I begin taking steps toward building discipline, even while yoga brings me freedom.

Am I what I read?

Posted on July 3, 2014June 30, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

In “The Polysyllabic Spree,” Nick Hornby writes, “All the books we own, both read and unread, are the fullest expression of self we have at our disposal. … But with each passing year, and with each whimsical purchase, our libraries become more and more able to articulate who we are, whether we read the books or not.”

It’s an arguable point, but one I identified with immediately. My bookcases are stuffed to overflowing with books I haven’t yet read, and I’m always acquiring more. I’m admittedly, unabashedly a book hoarder.

Sometimes those piles of books paralyze me. I’m so excited by the choices that I can’t decide what to read next. That’s been the case quite often in recent months, and even more so since I returned from Book Expo America; a tidy pile of advance reader copies now lines one wall of my bedroom.

It’s not just that I can’t decide what to read first. If only things were so simple! I’ve also run out of space in which to store all of these books. I have books in my living room, books in my kitchen. I’d store books in my bathroom if there were only a bit more space. I tuck books into the nooks of my secretary-style desk, and I pile books artfully on the shelves of end tables.

There’s a method to my madness, with genres sorted by room and shelves. But my bedroom is now out of control. The bookcase holds Alabama books and writing books, and my most treasured books top my dresser. But I’ve got borrowed books tucked beneath the head of my bed, and books I intend to mail to my nephew at the foot. (Books meant to be mailed to Mom are in the backseat of my car, because who needs logic?) Recent acquisitions were perched atop and nestled beside my typewriter, but that space has overflowed. Now, they’re stacked between my dresser and the wall and, as I’ve mentioned, lining one wall of my room.

I know it’s a bit crazy, but I’ve made my peace with the disarray. If it’s good enough for Nick Hornby, it’s good enough for me.

These are the books I’ve acquired in the six weeks since and including BEA.

Dangerous by Susan Fast
The Objects of Her Affection by Sonya Cobb
Straight White Male by John Niven
Liberty’s Torch by Elizabeth Mitchell
The Walled City by Ryan Graudin
What Do You Do with An Idea? by Kobi Yamada (Read it, loved it, glad he gave me a copy for my nephew, too.)
On Immunity by Eula Biss
Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talleh
We Are Not Ourselves by Matthew Thomas
Neverhome by Laird Hunt
King Dork Approximately by Frank Portman
The David Foster Wallace Reader
Reunion by Hannah Pittard
The Story Hour by Thrity Umrigar
The Great Escape by Andrew Steinmetz
The Giver by Lois Lowry
The Short and Tragic Life of Robert Peace by Jeff Hobbs
Epilogue by Will Boast
Letters to a Birmingham Jail
Soldier of Change by Stephen Snyder-Hill
File Under: 13 Suspicious Incidents by Lemony Snickett
Chakra Meditation by Swami Sadadananda
Mo’s Mustache by Ben Clanton (Read and ready to send to my little nephew!)
Rain Reign by Ann M. Martin
This Is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper
So We Read On by Maureen Corrigan
Terminal City by Linda Fairstein (Picked up for my aunt, still sitting in my bedroom. Oops.)
The Miniaturist by Jessie Burton
Fire Shut Up in My Bones by Charles M. Blow
The Republic of Imagination by Azar Nafisi
The Secret Wisdom of the Earth by Christopher Scotton
Goodnight June by Sarah Jio
Wild Idea: Buffalo & Family in a Difficult Land by Dan O’Brien (I actually had to leave my copy at BEA because I couldn’t carry any more books, but I re-acquired it at Church Street’s Book Hangout last week. Hurrah!)
The Elements of Style Illustrated by William Strunk Jr. and E.B. White (Purchased at The Strand)
Writers on Writing (Purchased at The Strand)
Love, Loss and What I Wore by Nora and Delia Ephron (Purchased at The Strand)
Only As Good As Your Word by Susan Shapiro (Purchased at The Strand; this was the one book I bought that I didn’t set out to find. What a happy surprise! I have enjoyed Susan Shapiro’s work in the past, and while on the flight to New York I read a Writer’s Digest article that mentioned her.)
Still Writing by Dani Shapiro (Purchased at The Strand)
The Leftovers by Tom Perrotta (I found this in a freebie pile at the office–we receive more books than we can possibly write anything about–and snagged it because the commercials for the new HBO show had been creeping me out. I’m about halfway through and intrigued.)
Your Fathers, Where are They? And the Prophets, Do They Live Forever? by Dave Eggers (Also found in the freebie pile in the office. I’m intrigued by Eggers and I would, of course, like to have a career in which I too can write across a variety of genres and find success.)
My Conference Can Beat Your Conference by Paul Finebaum (SEC! SEC! SEC!)
The Public Library: A Photographic Essay by Robert Dawson (A library book, but one I’m likely to end up purchasing for myself.)
The Everything Store: Jeff Bezos and the Age of Amazon by Brad Stone (Also a library book, but worth mentioning.)

The dream that you wish will come true

Posted on July 1, 2014June 23, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

When I was 10 years old, I decided I wanted to make my living as a writer. Thirteen years later, I saw my name in print at the end of my first paid, professional clip.

My journalism professors at the University of Alabama often encouraged us to pitch story ideas to a range of publications, even if those ideas were developed in the classroom. I’ve never been particularly quick to step up and tell someone why I deserve their attention, and so interviewing folks for those classroom assignments was intimidating. (I still get nervous before many interviews, even a decade later!) Approaching editors about publishing my work was even more so.

But my spring 2004 review writing class, taught by Alabama Public Radio book reviewer and University of Alabama professor emeritus Don Noble, left me with plenty of material. Dr. Noble required us to review something weekly; sometimes our focus was restaurants, sometimes books, other times, music. I sent several of my assignments on to the student newspaper, The Crimson White. And I suspected I could do more still.

Getting published in Relevant magazine was one of my goals, and so I sent an email out into the ether, pitching a book review I wrote for class. After a round of heavy editing, which cut the review from several hundred words to about 50, my first national piece was ready to go. I was interning in Orlando when the magazine finally hit stands, and my friends shared in my excitement. The paycheck wasn’t much ($10, if memory serves), but I was still thrilled to be compensated for doing something I loved.

Ten years later, I still write about both books and music. Although seeing my name in print has become a regular occasion, the thrill never wears off.

What I’m writing: June 2014

Posted on June 30, 2014June 24, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

These are stories I wrote that were published this month.

Meet Birmingham magazine Account Executive Rebecca Garner

Birmingham magazine Account Executive Rebecca Garner lived in New Mexico and Hawaii before making her home in Alabama. This University of New Mexico alumna resides in Odenville with her husband, who is in the Air Force, her 14-year-old stepson and 3-year-old daughter. Wherever life has taken her, though, Rebecca has found success working in sales for magazines, newspapers and commercial printing. Read more “Meet Birmingham magazine Account Executive Rebecca Garner” at al.com.

Life after Book Expo America

It’s been more than a week since I returned from Book Expo America, and I’m starting to feel as though I can answer people’s enthusiastic inquiries about the experience. Part of that period of radio silence has been because I came home with a sinus infection, but it’s also because I just needed time to digest the event.
I went to BEA with few goals in mind. Since this was my first year, I knew I would be overwhelmed. I didn’t really know what I would get from the event, so I set my expectations low. I planned to show up, hoped to get Ann M. Martin’s autograph and wanted to walk away with some free books and insight into the publishing industry. Read more “Life after Book Expo America” at churchstreetshop.com.

Indian Springs School shines as ‘The Fault in Our Stars’ reaches meteoric levels

Indian Springs School has had many turns in the limelight, and it’s stepping into familiar territory again, thanks to John Green’s “The Fault in Our Stars.” The movie adaptation of the Springs graduate’s novel was the No.1 film at the box office during its debut weekend, and author Green’s name has been all over the media as a result.

Green is only one of a number of notable Springs alumni; others include fellow author Daniel Alarcon, director John Badham, Federal Reserve Bank of Philadelphia CEO and president Charles Plosser, Continental Bakery owner Carole Griffin, “Game of Thrones” TV show writer David Hill, Russell Lands chairman and CEO Ben Russell and many more. Read more “Indian Springs School shines as ‘The Fault in Our Stars’ reaches meteoric levels” at al.com.

I Am Having So Much Fun Here Without You: To win back a lost love

Richard Haddon has screwed up royally with his wife, and he’ll do anything to get her back.

Richard, a British contemporary artist, met his near-perfect French wife while enrolled at the Rhode Island School of Design. From the moment he spotted Anne-Laure de Bourigeaud, Richard was convinced that she was the woman for him. Shortly after they married, Anne became pregnant, and their relationship served as the inspiration for one of Richard’s greatest paintings, “The Blue Bear.” Read more “I Am Having So Much Fun Here Without You” at bookpage.com.

Behind the Lyrics: Lee Bains III’s love of Southern literature is reflected in his songwriting

He’s been around the Birmingham music scene for a long time, but with the 2012 release of Lee Bains III & the Glory Fires’ debut album, “There’s a Bomb in Gilead,” Bains unleashed his songwriting on listeners’ ears. The former member of the Dexateens and Arkadelphia is back with “Dereconstructed,” the Glory Fires’ second album and debut on the SubPop label.
This time around, Bains and the band have cranked up the volume. “Dereconstructed” is a rocker throughout, portraying the band’s level of comfort on stage and the intimate setting in which they recorded. “It was super loud, so there are guitars in the drum mikes and there are drums in the guitar-amp mikes. Those are all purposeful decisions we made, but they were all geared toward creating a more visceral kind of sound,” Bains says. Read more “Behind the Lyrics” at bhammag.com.

The Highlight of Book Expo? Love of Story.

During our walk back to day two of BEA following a long, quiet lunch, my friend Trisha asked my impression of the event so far. As managing editor of BookPage (where you can regularly find my book reviews!), she’s a BEA vet. But this was my first year to attend the massive publishing industry event, which is both awesome and overwhelming.
I’m accustomed to magazine conferences, thanks to my full-time job as managing editor of Birmingham magazine. I love those gatherings; I’m a big believer in journalism and its value, and such gatherings often encourage and challenge me. Read more “The Highlight of Book Expo” at churchstreetshop.com.

Want more? Visit my “What I’m writing” Pinterest board.

Pre-order my book, “Muscle Shoals Sound Studio: How the Swampers Changed American Music”

Posted on June 23, 2014June 26, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

We’re one month away from the release of “Muscle Shoals Sound Studio: How the Swampers Changed American Music,” a history of one of northwest Alabama’s legendary recording studios. That means there’s plenty of time for pre-orders! Here are your options:

Alabama Booksmith: My first book signing will be at Alabama Booksmith on July 21 at 4 p.m. I’m thrilled to kick off the book there! Jake Reiss cultivates relationships with authors and readers alike, and every visit to his store is a treat. (Every book on the Booksmith’s shelves is autographed! Bonus.) And although it has absolutely nothing to do with me and my book, I’m excited for the “Mockingbird” event the Booksmith will host on July 23 at the Alabama Theatre. Won’t you join me?
Church Street Coffee and Books: I’m a big fan of local bookstores, and I’m grateful that one of mine has partnered with me in the pre-order process. If you’re into autographed books, this is another great option; when you order, leave a note indicating that you’d like the book autographed, and I’ll do so before it’s sent your way.
The History Press: You can also order the book directly from the publisher. They’d love it if you left a nice comment about the book, whether you buy it from them or elsewhere.
Barnes and Noble: One of the great things about working with The History Press is their distribution relationships; my book will available at Barnes and Noble and Books-A-Million locations. (Sorry, Mom and Dad–it will likely be readily available in Alabama, but I can’t promise it’ll be on the shelves everywhere.)
Books-A-Million: It’s one of the nation’s largest bookstores, but Books-A-Million also supports my local economy, as it’s based in Birmingham, Ala.
Amazon: Be sure to check out my author page while you’re there. (I’m tickled to bits to have an author page!)

If you’re more inclined to borrow a book from your local library, I would love for you to check my book out! It isn’t yet available for request in my library system, but I do hope they’ll have it on the shelves of at least one location. I am a big believer in the value of libraries, and I would be honored if you checked my book out from yours.

The yoga of being there

Posted on June 20, 2014June 17, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

I had hoped to attend at least one yoga class while I was in New York last month. I’ve got to review several classes as part of my yoga teacher training, and I thought it would be intriguing to see how things were done in another part of the country. So I asked my regular teacher for recommendations, jotted down the studio and teacher she suggested and tentatively planned to zip from my conference to a little downward dog action.

It didn’t happen.

There are a number of reasons, and what I thought would be the biggest (the studio’s location in relation to the conference, which wasn’t especially convenient) turned out to be the least of my worries. I spent two days on my feet surrounded my tens of thousands of other people. I was wiped by the end of each day, and the last thing I needed was a physically challenging asana practice.

But as any teacher trainee or relatively dedicated yogi would tell you, asana is only one part of yoga.

I had plenty of opportunity to focus on yoga’s other aspects (and, OK, even a little asana) during Book Expo America. I spent a great deal of time focused on my breath, trying to stay calm in the midst of an overstimulating environment. I tried to let outside distractions fall away and turn my focus inward. And I spent a great deal of time in tadasana, or mountain pose, attempting to root my feet into the ground, lift my inner arches and support my spine with my core muscles, even as I waited in line for nearly an hour in some cases to meet various authors.

I love the asana practice, and it’s what drew me–and so many others–to yoga. But there’s so much more happening on my mat than my bending into funny postures. And although my body ached at the end of a few days of BEA, I’m always grateful for the reminder that there’s more to yoga than downward facing dog.

Loving local music

Posted on June 18, 2014June 20, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

You would think I’d be tired of these songs by now. But you’d be wrong.

I’ve been lucky that my life and career have allowed me a lot of opportunities to support Birmingham, the city I love above all others. This spring, that included judging entries in the Alys Stephens Center’s ASC Commissions Birmingham songwriting contest. Beginning in January, the ASC invited local songwriters to submit videos of their original songs for this contest. Over the course of three weeks in April and May, a panel of judges reviewed the 86 submissions, rating them on qualities such as originality and how much each song reflects the city.

Yes, that means I listened to and rated 86 songs. That task became even more difficult after the judging panel narrowed the list down to 12 finalists. I listened to those 12 songs over and over and over again in an effort to determine which stood out the most.

I was in great company on this panel, which included Chris Confessore, resident conductor of the Alabama Symphony Orchestra; Eric Essix, UAB Department of Music instructor and president of Essix Music Group/Essential Recordings; composer Yotam Haber, director of MATA Festival; Bobby Horton, musical historian and composer; Kimberly Kirklin, director of the ASC’s ArtPlay; Scott Register, host of “Reg’s Coffeehouse” on Birmingham Mountain Radio; and Jessica Simpson, owner of Artistic Endeavors, LLC. It’s a talented group of people with a range of preferences, and so I wasn’t surprised to learn that the finalists reflect a variety of genres.

This weekend, the top three contenders will be announced, and each will receive studio time to record their songs.

Join me and the musicians on June 21 to celebrate LOCAL, a free festival featuring music, food, brews and goods. The event will include merchants such as Oli. O, Green Bottle Candle Co. and Stone Hollow Farmstead Pantry, food and drinks from Steel City Pops, Octane and others and performances by the contest’s 12 finalists. In the meantime, take a sneak peek at the finalists. My votes have already been cast, but I’d love to hear what you think of this talented group.

My first bit of book-related press!

Posted on June 11, 2014June 26, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

If you know me well, you know I’m reluctant to use exclamation marks in my writing. But some events justify their use, and this is one of them:

Today, I received the first bit of press coverage for my forthcoming book, “Muscle Shoals Sound Studio.” The book, a history of a landmark studio in the northwest corner of Alabama, is set for publication on July 22. Many thanks to Jennifer Stewart Kornegay and LEAN Magazine for recommending my work to their readers! You can read the summer issue online at
readlean.org (I’m on page 31) or pick up a copy at many CVS and Publix locations throughout Alabama. Pre-order the book at churchstreetshop.com.

What I’m writing: May 2014

Posted on May 30, 2014June 24, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

These are stories I wrote that were published this month.

How the Babysitters Club Changed My Life: A Reader at BEA

The No. 1 event on my BEA wish list was meeting “The Baby-Sitters Club” author Ann M. Martin. For better or worse, her autographing session for her forthcoming book, “Rain Reign,” was first thing Thursday morning. I quickly learned I wasn’t the only person whose excitement was nearing panic-attack levels; Stacey, a high-school teacher from Baltimore, was equally thrilled to read the woman who wrote books almost as fast as we could read them. Read more “How the Babysitters Club Changed My Life” at churchstreetshop.com.

Dream Come True: Heading to New York for Book Expo America

For the past several years, I’ve listened with envy as my publishing industry friends have recounted their tales from the Book Expo of America. I’ve been almost equally obsessed with reading and writing for as long as I can recall (at least since age 4). It was mind boggling to me that people I knew got to attend a conference focused on books, the object I treasure above all others. Then I realized I, too, could attend this conference. Read more “Dream Come True” at churchstreetshop.com.

Lee Bains III shares how his band, The Glory Fires, ended up signing with Sub Pop Records

Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires (Photo by Wes Frazer for Sub Pop Records)

Lee Bains III has worked his way around the Birmingham music circuit for a while, with notable past appearances in Tuscaloosa-based Dexateens and his own Arkadelphia. Now Bains is making noise as the front man of Lee Bains III & The Glory Fires. We caught up with him to talk about the band’s latest album, Dereconstructed, which releases today via Sub Pop Records. Although it’s the band’s second album, it’s their first on the label, which has garnered respect by releasing albums from bands such as Nirvana, Band of Horses, The Head and the Heart and more. You’ll find that interview in the June issue of Birmingham magazine, but in honor of the album’s release, we’re including an additional snippet of our conversation with Bains below. Read more “Lee Bains III shares how his band, The Glory Fires, ended up signing with Sub Pop Records” at bhammag.com.

Meet Birmingham magazine Account Associate Amy Cash

Since Birmingham magazine’s staff is small, we don’t often have the luxury of seeing interns become employees. But Account Associate Amy Cash is one of two current employees who hold that distinction. Before joining our staff full time in 2013, Amy was a marketing and advertising intern at the magazine. Read more “Meet Birmingham magazine Account Associate Amy Cash” at bhammag.com.

A Toast to Do Dah Day

An event that grew out of a group of friends gathering for happy hour will celebrate its 35th anniversary this year. In the late 1970s, Boutwell Recording Studios founder Ed Boutwell would meet his advertising industry friends for a drink at Dugan’s every Friday. During one of these gatherings, Boutwell mentioned that Birmingham didn’t have a go-to spring event. One of the friends gathered suggested a parade, and Do Dah Day was born. “We drank our way through the formation of that,” Boutwell, 76, recalls. Read more “A Toast to Do Dah Day” at bhammag.com.

Crestline Park: This Birmingham neighborhood includes a number of businesses tucked into a residential area

Chandler Busby of Neighborhood Hops & Vine (Photo by Wes Frazer)

In 2012, I moved from a three-bedroom, one-bathroom, 1,100-square-foot house to a two-bedroom, one-bathroom, 750-square-foot home. I’m not an empty nester who was looking to downsize; rather, I was a 30-year-old who had been steadily amassing “grown-up” furniture and art. So why would my roommate and I opt to give up the spare bedroom and extra dining space our previous home offered? Because the trade-off was a home in Crestline Park, a charming east Birmingham neighborhood within a short drive of our downtown offices, adjacent to Mountain Brook’s amenities as well as Eastwood’s shopping options and within walking distance of several neighborhood restaurants. Read more “Crestline Park” at bhammag.com.

Want more? Visit my “What I’m writing” Pinterest board.

Struggling with perfectionism

Posted on May 5, 2014 by Carla Jean Whitley

I’m in the process of becoming trained as a yoga teacher, and the nine-month-long training includes writing a number of papers. I’ll post them here because, well, that’s what I do. The third writing assignment was a reflection on chakras. This assignment was challenging for me because the concepts are so different from what I’m accustomed to. But I also enjoy learning about things outside of my norm, so I’m continuing to study this.

I often wrestle with my perfectionist tendencies. That shows up in the words I use to describe myself and my key traits. Am I Type A, anal retentive, obsessive? Or am I detail oriented, organized and methodical?

I’ve been faced with those labels (yet again) as I go through yoga teacher training. This week I’ve been trying to read “Eastern Body, Western Mind,” a 450-page book that explores the chakras, or energy centers, and psychology. I’m supposed to be concentrating on a chakra for a week, addressing it in some way three times daily.

This has been an especially busy season of life, and so I tried to take what seemed like the easy way out on this one. I have a ton of lavender-scented items around my house, so I would figure out which chakra lavender interacted with and start working on that. A friend shared a chart representing the correlation of different oils to different chakras, making my work much easier. Lavender correlates with the crown and third eye chakras? Great. I’ll pay attention to one of those.

So I did—or I tried to, at least. I slathered myself with lavender-citrus body lotion that first morning. I donned a purple shirt. (I’ll confess, I still wasn’t sure which chakra I was addressing, but I figured purple was a safe bet. I haven’t yet figured out the difference between indigo and violet, but those are the colors of these two chakras.) I smeared purple eye shadow in the creases of my eyelids, and I was off.

I know this sounds like a poorly executed plan. It was. I’ve felt pulled in many directions lately, and I’m struggling to keep up. A couple of busy weeks have meant that I’ve put off my reading and even let my yoga practice slip. After-work commitments and impending deadlines have gotten the best of me, and I’ve allowed them to do so.

On the first night, I came home from work early and changed into a pair of yoga pants. I had articles left to edit and plans yet to make, but I could at least be comfortable doing so. (I opted to keep on my purple shirt for whatever chakra-related energy it might provide.) I slipped back into the busy-ness.

Hours later, I realized I was hungry and past my usual dinner time. But I needed something more than dinner; I needed grounding. As an omelet slowly cooked on my stovetop, I returned to my mat. My practice wasn’t complicated or especially challenging. I used a Yoga Journal-suggested sequence I had programmed into my phone on the ride back from the beach earlier this week (even four-and-a-half hour car trips can be productive, right?). It was 13 minutes without adequate warm up, and I could feel throughout my body the tightness that comes from a sedentary, stressful life. But I was moving, and it felt good.

That movement also prompted a realization: I realized that the cerebral, ethereal energy centers of the crown and third-eye chakras aren’t where my focus needs to be concentrated—at least not in a way that would encourage further development. If anything, I could be overdeveloped in these areas. It’s not like me to shift course mid-journey. I like to make a plan and stick with it. But in this case, I needed to make a change.

Instead, I shifted my attention to my root chakra. Part of my craving for control is surely tied to a desire for security and order in all things. I’ve got that in some areas of my life, but in others I’m experiencing a lot of ambiguity. I’m seeking balance and a healthy relationship with that uncertainty as I continue to face my Type-A personality in all its glory and shame.

After all, that’s why I began practicing yoga.

But even though I know that focusing on being grounded is the right choice for me right now, those struggles have continued to show up. I’ve gone through the motions, donning essential oils, drinking ginger tea and focusing on mountain pose. The entire concept of chakras is so other, though, that I’m having trouble wrapping my head around how all of these pieces tie together. I’ve grown frustrated with myself because I just don’t get it.

Even so, I’ll continue to wrestle with these concepts. Just as yoga is about the journey, not the destination, I suspect that grasping related concepts is an ongoing process.