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I’m running and not quite sure where to go

Posted on by Carla Jean Whitley

So I’m sure that this won’t come across as artfully as it could, as I’m still battling a dizzy spell that swept in about half an hour ago. It settled in during my quiet time, which ordinarily would frustrate me. My time with God is never as satisfying to me when I’m sick, as I struggle to focus and my mind has trouble wrapping itself around anything remotely deep. Dizziness doesn’t help such a situation. Tonight, however, those road blocks didn’t get me down so much.

Lately, I’ve really been struggling with what direction my life is taking. That’s really been a theme of the past year – sometimes I look back and get upset with myself for the lack of progress I’ve made. But God is good, and He’s really taught me quite a bit through these trials. I was really questioning whether I wanted to go back to school at all last week, but I have come to the conclusion that I was (basically) running from commitment. That’s not an attractive quality, now is it? 🙂

I am a little frightened to say “this is what I’m going to do with my life” about a certain career or what have you. That’s a pretty big deal. But to continue running is immature and, quite honestly, spitting in the face of my God. He has created me to glorify Him, and refusing to do that by utilizing the gifts He has bestowed upon me doesn’t strike me as the wisest avenue to take.

So I’m praying. What are those gifts, and how can I best use them? (The struggle that has marked the past several years of my existence continues – who am I?) In doing so, I pull out a graduation card given to me by a dear friend just barely less than a year ago. I look up the verses that she gave to me, and again, God encourages me with His word.

My heart is stirred by a noble theme
as I recite my verses for the king;
my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.
Psalm 45:1

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms. I Peter 4:10

I need honor and love in my life from somebody who’s playing for keeps

Posted on by Carla Jean Whitley

Why is that libraries, though similar in purpose to bookstores, don’t possess the same romantic qualities?

Perhaps because of the lack of commitment required of a library book? Here, I walk in, pick up whatever strikes me as interesting, check it out, and that’s that. No money required, little thought is demanded, and if I don’t like it, I can just drop it off in the return bin tomorrow.

Bookstores, however, are quite different. Rarely am I able to pick a book off a shelf and leave within five minutes. No, bookstores demand a greater commitment. If I am going to spend an ungodly amount of money on a stack of bound paper, then I want to be sure that it’s worth my while. I’ll carefully read the back, perhaps look over the table of contents, maybe glance through the pages. I’ll carry the book around the store with me for a while as I look over the other options. Is this really the book that I want? Will I be proud to have it displayed on my shelf for years to come? Will I regret the time and money invested in it later?

Am I still talking about books? Or is this post really about men?

You be the judge.

Good coffee, strong coffee

Posted on by Carla Jean Whitley

I’ve been a coffee drinker for only two years now, but in the time since developing a fondness for this beverage, I’ve made an important discovery. It isn’t so much the coffee itself that is important. While the caffeine and the flavors mixed with it are delightful, my real joy comes from the coffee shop itself.

Whether I’m sitting in Starbucks in Philadelphia, perusing my Bible alongside a Carmel Machiatto and several friends, or studying ADHD in Tallahassee’s own Aristotle’s, there’s something about the atmosphere in these establishments that is almost romantic. Coffee shops share that mysterious romance that bookstores possess. It is not necessarily one of roses and kisses, but the warm fuzzy feeling that arises is one to be treasured indeed.

In fact, the primary reason I find myself in coffee shops is seldom the coffee. I come here to enjoy conversation with friends, or to curl up on the couch in the sun to read my Bible and pray. The coffee is often an afterthought ‘ the price of admission to enjoy the comfortable atmosphere.

As I write this, I am sitting in my newly discovered favorite coffee shop in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. I knew that The Crimson Caf’ bore marks of a home for my heart upon my first visit. Being as intrigued by interior design as I am, the atmosphere of a space is important to me. Thus, I smiled as I spotted the worn hardwood floors that welcomed me. The plaster covered walls add texture to the shop, and the patches of brick peeking out from this fa’ade contribute character. The stone waterfall fountain in the corner invites my imagination to wander to places I’ve been. Oak Mountain and streams in North Carolina are welcome vacations for my often weary mind.

The burlap coffee sacks hanging from the walls and ceiling evoke thoughts of places far away as well ‘ specifically Javaheads in Tallahassee, Florida. I smile as I recall many treasured moments spent within the walls of that now distant coffee haven. Good times with good friends seem inevitable in such an establishment. Needless to say, I could spend hours here, daydreaming about many happy days gone by.

But naturally, The Crimson Caf’ invites many new memories to be formed. The well stocked shelf on the wall holds a variety of board games, just waiting for me to take them down and enjoy the camaraderie they create. My first visit here left me acquainted with the shop’s copy of Trivial Pursuit. We didn’t get far in the game that night, but somehow board games invite friendship quite naturally. The rabbit trails of conversation that we chased left us more familiar with one another, and a new memory to be held.

The furnishings are simple and serve not to detract from the atmosphere, but instead play a supporting role. The couches in the corner invite many a comfortable conversation, and the solid wooden tables and chairs throughout provide space for study groups and board games alike. The big screen TV on the stage like area provides customers with the latest news or the biggest sports event ‘ whichever might currently be of greater interest. (This is, after all, a football town.) I wonder if locals might set up on that stage and provide my ears with some joyful strains of music some night?

On a gorgeous day like this lazy Sunday, light streams in through the large plate glass windows. The room is filled, from floor to the exposed beam ceiling, with light and, for me, happiness. I may be new in town, but I know already that this place is clearly to be cherished.