Furniture that doesn’t take up much space, such as a coffee table with thin legs and a glass-topped, neutral-colored entry table, help make my tiny living room appear more spacious.
I share 780 square feet with a roommate and two cats–and this isn’t the smallest place I’ve lived. But like that smaller space (a one-bedroom garage apartment), it’s one of my favorite dwelling places.
The tiny dimensions come in handy when I tackle projects like Apartment Therapy’s January Cure. I love this site’s periodic organization and cleaning challenges, even though I tend to be a hair obsessive about order on my own. And my roommate already loves it because the first assignment resulted in me cleaning all of the floors in the house.
My friend Carrie has written at some length about her affection for New Year’s resolutions (she tends to turn them into blogging challenges), but the truth is, I have a number of projects on my plate already. I’ve got several exciting writing assignments ahead, additional yoga training later this month and a book due in March. So I kept my official resolutions simple: floss every day (so far, so good!) and work on the aforementioned manuscript daily (until it’s due, of course, so that’s kind of a cheat of a resolution).
Even so, I can always make time for a more orderly, tidy life–especially since I have so little space to clean. When I exist in a calm space, I feel better equipped to deal with the chaos of daily life.
My small-space living tip is keeping on top of things so you don’t feel like the walls are closing in on you. How do you make the most of your space?
On the 12th day of Christmas, my true love gave to me 12 drummers drumming
Eleven pipers piping
Ten lords a-leaping
Nine ladies dancing
Eight maids a-milking
Seven swans a-swimming
Six geese a-laying
Five golden rings
Four calling birds
Three French hens
Two turtle doves
And a partridge in a pear tree.
I’m a leader, sometimes to the point of being pushy. That’s a natural result of being an oldest child.
Around age 3 my sister Cristin, who is 14 months and nine days younger than me, was a ballerina for Halloween. I couldn’t in good conscience send her to the church fall festival without a few steps in her repertoire, and so I took it upon myself to teach her some basic ballet steps.
I’m now 33, and I have yet to take a day of ballet.
And so I shouldn’t have been surprised when I solved the Mystery of the Twelve Days of Christmas. Growing up, Cristin and I would often sing the song and perform hand motions. (A late-’80s video of this is a family treasure.) But as we grew older, I could never find anyone else who knew these motions. I became convinced it was an Alabama thing. That must be why our Florida brethren had no idea why we jutted our chins back and forth when singing “two turtle doves.”
I moved back to Alabama in 2003, and I was certain that I would at last find my kind of holiday performer. But after months of asking around, I still couldn’t find anyone who knew what I was talking about. I’ve since Googled in search of our kindred, and while there are videos documenting motions, they only occasionally overlap with our performances.
At last, I realized my older sibling tendencies must have struck again. Without any evidence that others know these motions, I deduced that I made up the movements and taught Cristin to follow in the foolishness.
Merry Christmas! Enjoy the documentation of our foolishness, circa February 2003.
On Nov. 16, I graduated from Sacred Glow Yoga’s 200-hour teacher training program. I’m now a certified yoga teacher, registered with Yoga Alliance and excited to help you find your way on your mat! The nine-month-long training includes writing a number of papers, which I’ve posted here because, well, that’s what I do. The final writing assignment was to reflect on the experience as a whole.
I’m rarely at a loss for words, but I don’t know how to reflect on the nine-month period that has encapsulated yoga teacher training. My head spins when I try to recall the amount of information we’ve covered in these 200 hours, as well as the knowledge imparted from assigned reading and practice teaching. And of course, daily life has continued throughout this training.
That’s probably the most significant thing I’m taking from this experience: deeper knowledge of how my time on the mat affects everything else in life. I’ve learned how much I struggle with discipline as I try to build a regular home practice, and I see that pop up as well when I’m faced with a task that I’m less than enthused by. I’ve finally learned what the SI joint and sacrum are, and I now find myself regularly moving through not only a lengthening axial wave, but also a Y wave to relieve stress on those areas. I have a better understanding of my body (and the tight hamstrings that limit me so!), and through that I’m better able to offer others grace in their practices.
I’ve worked for years to establish boundaries, saying no when I need to and recognizing how much energy I have to offer other people and obligations. But this training has also helped me in saying yes. I’ve been challenged to recognize my strengths, and to define myself by those rather than my weaknesses. I am capable of so many things, and there’s nothing to be gained in denying that.
But most of all, I’ve realized how much I still have to learn. Whether it’s chakras or anatomy, developing a deeper understanding of yoga has introduced me to concepts and knowledge that I don’t always find easy to grasp. As I begin to live out these lessons as a teacher and guide others through them, I hope to continue reading, studying and increasing my understanding of this physical, spiritual, mental practice that has had such an effect on my daily life.
The journey has only just begun.
Join me for the next step Sunday, when I’ll lead a free, public class at Lululemon. The hour-long class begins at 6 p.m.
Today’s subject line comes from the poem “Wild Geese” by Mary Oliver … which I found by googling yoga poems. Of course.
The inspiration for my header photo–the bookcase at the foot of my bed.
I took this photo as Cheryl coached me via text message. I never would’ve thought to carry the whole setup outside, but it made a world of difference.
Cheryl’s editing took my work to another level.
Illustration and business card design by Nimblee Design
Logo by Aly Hathcock, stamp by SimplyStamps.com
Skandasana (turkey pose)
Vrksana (tree pose)
And … it’s me!
Me again.
You are your own brand. That’s become a modern-day mantra, and it seems most creative professionals I know have a suite of features to back that up. But I hadn’t given too much thought to my personal branding until this summer, when several factors converged.
Days before my book released, I spoke at See Jane Write’s inaugural Bloganista conference. Keynote speaker Megan LaRussa Chenoweth of Southern Femme encouraged everyone in attendance to have a logo. Graphic designer Aly Hathcock quickly tweeted she would offer a discount to any conference attendees, and I took her up on it, even without knowing exactly what I’d do with a logo.
The end game wasn’t clear, but I was already in the process of organizing an LLC, Ink-Stained Life. I’ve worked as a freelance writer and editor for more than a decade under my own name, but selling copies of my book at non-bookstore events changed the game a bit. I opted to adopt my blog’s name as my business name, and Aly’s offer kept those wheels spinning. A logo might spur a slight website rebranding, I thought, and who knows how else it’ll come in handy?
As I’ve attended book signings and speaking engagements, numerous people have requested my business card. I’ve got Birmingham magazine cards, of course, and folks can always reach me there. But I try to limit my work correspondence to work, just as I try to keep said correspondence outside of my personal email. Quickly, I realized it would be worth my money to invest in personal business cards.
In a Facebook group I’m part of, some women recommended incorporating your headshot into business cards to amp up the mental association. It’s an idea that makes sense, but didn’t feel comfortable to me (only in part because I update my headshots more frequently than I run out of business cards!). A friend suggested I use the illustration on my stationery, and so I reached out to Sara Beth Cobb of Nimblee Design to discuss options. Sara Beth created the stationery for me years ago as a birthday present, and it always makes an impression. I was thrilled when she agreed to incorporate both the illustration and my logo into a business card–and even more excited by the results. Both Sara Beth and Aly took my ideas and created designs that capture my personality.
The most hands-on part of this branding process for me, though, was my website’s new header photo. I’m not a strong photographer, and I was unsure whether I’d be able to create an image I’d be happy with. But I had a vision in mind, and my 1920s Underwood typewriter was at the heart of it. (I told Cheryl Joy Miner of Cheryl Joy Miner Photography, who also took my headshot and yoga photos, that I seriously contemplated if I could carry the typewriter on my flight to Florida, where she’s based.)
Because that wasn’t practical, Cheryl instead coached me via text message as my bedroom became the site of a DIY photo shoot. She gave me advice on composing the items and ultimately encouraged me to carry the entire setup outside. Not only did that achieve the lighting and quirky interest I was after, it also ties back to the photos she took of me in her backyard.
The end result is a suite of branded materials that feel true to me and my work, made all the more special because of relationships with the wonderful, creative women with whom I collaborated.
Join me Sept. 28 and Oct. 5 at 2 p.m. for 60 minutes of yoga. We’ll work through a series of poses that will work the core of your body–and that goes much deeper than the six-pack abs we so often hear about.
FAQ:
Where (and what) is Desert Island Supply Co.?
This nonprofit writing center is on the first floor of Woodrow Hall in Woodlawn. The address is 5500 First Ave. N., and you can find more info at desertislandsupplyco.com.
What do I wear?
As long as you can move comfortably, you’re set! I do recommend wearing a top that won’t flip upside down with you. A pair of comfortable shorts or pants and a fitted top would work well.
What do I bring?
Come armed with a yoga mat (I will NOT have any on hand) and water.
Why are you doing this?
I’m weeks from becoming a certified yoga teacher, and this is part of my homework. I figured I might as well share the love with my friends!
Will you be teaching again?
I imagine so! Sign up for my email list here: eepurl.com/3mtKr I don’t expect to send you more than one message per month.
More questions? Holler at me! cjATcarlajeanwhitleyDOTcom
I’m in the process of becoming trained as a yoga teacher, and the nine-month-long training includes writing a number of papers. I’ll post them here because, well, that’s what I do. The sixth writing assignment was a reflection on the book “Teaching People, Not Poses: 12 Principles for Teaching Yoga with Integrity” by Jay Fields. This is my favorite book we’ve read in all of training.
When I’m uncomfortable or unconfident in a situation, I tend to quickly fall back on my rule-following habits. Rather than bringing personality or my opinions and experience to a situation, I’ll stick to the letter of the law. That’s a crutch that helps me through these circumstances, but it’s often not the most effective way to function.
That’s especially so when editing a piece of copy or teaching a class full of students. I’m in those situations because I’ve got expertise to share, and sticking to what I’ve been taught and nothing more means giving my writers and students less than my all. Jay Fields’ “Teaching People Not Poses: 12 Principles for Teaching Yoga with Integrity” is a wake-up call, a reminder that I’m not an automaton going through a series of pre-set motions.
Throughout this slim book, Fields reminded me that I have something to offer. That’s why my journalism students and magazine interns stay in touch with me for months or years after our professional relationships end. I’m confident that I’ve given them instruction and encouragement that will help them build careers. As I begin to add yoga to my teaching repertoire, I’ll best serve my students by remembering that they, too, will return to me because I have something to offer–and that “something” is more than a series of poses. If all they wanted was an effective workout, there are plenty of yoga videos and smartphone apps to guide a student through a satisfactory practice.
I know already that’s a reminder I’ll need to revisit as I become a yoga teacher. I’m prone to let my Type-A tendencies take over and forget that there’s more to learn than a set of pre-established rules. I expect to keep Fields’ book close at hand to help me find my voice as a yoga teacher.
I’m in the process of becoming trained as a yoga teacher, and the nine-month-long training includes writing a number of papers. I’ll post them here because, well, that’s what I do. The fifth writing assignment was a reflection on the book “Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are” by Brene Brown.
Earlier today I read a blurb for a New York Times story that grabbed my attention: “One of the biggest complaints in modern society is being overscheduled, overcommitted and overextended. Ask people at a social gathering how they are and the stock answer is ‘super busy,’ ‘crazy busy’ or ‘insanely busy.’ Nobody is just ‘fine’ anymore.” Because I was in the middle of five or six other things, I bookmarked the article to read later.
I’m a goal-oriented, driven people pleaser, and as a result I tend to overcommit myself. Many times those commitments are to good things, things I’m excited to do. But those obligations often steal my joy. I’m more focused on completing the task than I am on enjoying the process.
So as I read Brene Brown’s words about cultivating both play and rest, I was reminded of how quick I am to skew priorities. Much as Brown and her family prioritize sleep, time together, meaningful work and time to piddle, I recognize that my life is much more satisfying when those things take precedence. But I also keep a goals sheet that I refer to frequently.
These things aren’t necessarily counterproductive; most of my goals are directly tied to satisfying work. There was a time when I walked away from my lifelong dream of becoming a professional writer. After two years of putting that goal aside, I realized how much less myself I felt. Pursuing that work is an important part of me. f I were to emulate the Brown family’s “ingredients for joy and meaning” list, that would be near the top.
The danger is when I allow the work to crowd out other, sometimes even more important, ingredients. I’ve realized that in recent years, and my 30s have so far been focused on striving for a more balanced life with more thoughtfully drawn boundaries. Simultaneously, I’m learning that imperfection is OK. Perfection is a myth, a standard that isn’t humanly possible. By allowing myself to let go of others’ expectations for what I should do or who I should be, I’m better able to take ownership of my goals, my time and my life.
This is a repost of a story that originally appeared in the July 2007 issue of Birmingham magazine. Dick Coffee Jr. hasn’t missed an Alabama game since 1946. Hunter Finch tells himself that Auburn players can hear his voice above the din in Jordan-Hare Stadium. UAB graduate Jeremy Harper says the least a fan should do is become a season ticket holder.
Paul Finebaum may not know these men as individuals, but he’s well acquainted with their kind. Read more “The Never-Ending Season” at bhammag.com.
When Paul Finebaum came to town in 1980 as a Birmingham Post-Herald sports reporter, he had little idea of where his career would carry him. After decades as a newspaper reporter, columnist, syndicated sports talk radio host and author, this month Finebaum will be part of the launch of ESPN’s SEC Network on both television and radio. Nearly simultaneously, HarperCollins will publish “My Conference Can Beat Your Conference,” co-written with ESPN’s Gene Wojciechowski. The book focuses on the Southeastern Conference’s dominance and the 2013 season in particular.Read more “Riding the Rising Tide” at bhammag.com.
It’s 7 a.m. on December 23, and Madeleine Altimari is shimmying. In 30-second intervals, the girl attempts to perfect her moves, pausing in between for a quick drag from a cigarette. After each interval, she rates her work on a school-letter scale. She has yet to check off the day’s other rehearsal tasks: singing, scales, guitar.
Madeleine is two days shy of 10. Read more “2 a.m. at the Cat’s Pajamas” at bookpage.com.
Singer-songwriter Orenda Fink’s music has often been marked by her spiritual influences. That’s been true in her solo work as well as when she has recorded with fellow Alabama School of Fine Arts grad Maria Taylor under the name Azure Ray. Fink’s latest album, “Blue Dream,” was inspired by dreams and spiritual exploration that followed the death of her dog, Wilson. The album will be released by Saddle Creek on Aug. 19. Read more “Dreamy Tunes” at bhammag.com.
Who cares that the Atlantic Coast Conference’s Florida State University won the 2013 Bowl Championship Series college football championship? The Southeastern Conference ran away with the previous seven consecutive titles, saw a conference member finish second in the 2013 series and pitted conference members head-to-head for the 2011 title.
Does all of this sound like a foreign language? Then proceed to the next book review. But if your knee-jerk reaction to the SEC’s accolades is to argue that your conference is unquestionably the best, then bump to the top of your reading list My Conference Can Beat Your Conference: Why the SEC Still Rules College Football by Paul Finebaum and Gene Wojciechowski. Read more “My Conference Can Beat Your Conference” at bookpage.com.
I burst into tears as I answered the intake questions for UAB psychiatry. “I’m sad, and I’m having trouble getting up off the bathroom floor to work, and I think maybe I need help—and maybe the fact that I’m crying is proof,” I said. The man on the other end of the line quickly identified a psychologist he thought would be a good fit and scheduled my appointment.
I had been self-identifying my depression for 16 years before I placed that call, and before my first appointment ended, my therapist affirmed my diagnosis. “It sounds to me like you have a family history of depression, likely caused by a chemical imbalance but exacerbated by circumstances. I also think you have seasonal affective disorder. Does this sound right to you?” I loved that she gave me space to disagree, but I didn’t need to. Her words—and the treatment that followed—offered freedom.
In the years since, I’ve been on a small but important personal mission to help break through the stigma associated with mental-health issues. It’s hard to say what would have been different if I had sought help earlier. I’m not 100 percent confident in saying that the stigma was all that held me back. But I’ve always been scared to admit imperfection, even when flaws are beyond my control.
I’ve learned that things I thought were simply part of my personality were actually symptoms I didn’t have to live with. (Did you know it’s not normal to cry at least monthly for no apparent reason? I didn’t.) Taking a small, daily dose of an anti-depressant isn’t a big deal; as one friend noted, if I were diabetic I wouldn’t aim to get off of insulin. That shift in perspective is significant, and the symptoms of depression seem to show up when I lose perspective. Twice-monthly therapy appointments have helped me build healthy coping skills. Rather than believe the lies I tell myself, I’ve learned to articulate them to a friend. Although I still face insecurities (hi, I’m human), I know how to deal and don’t let them define me. When I hear how ridiculous it sounds, negative self talk loses its power.
Sertraline and therapy have been a regular part of my life for the past two years, and people find it difficult to believe I am actually depressed. My therapist says I’m in remission, for lack of a better term. Friends say it takes strength to admit when you need help. Although I agree, I wouldn’t have phrased it that way at the time. I simply knew I couldn’t walk through my depression alone.
Depression can be debilitating, but it doesn’t have to be. Let people into your life, and ask for help when and if you’re able.
Would you be willing to share your experience with depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts or other mental-health illness? Email me at cjATcarlajeanwhitleyDOTcom. I’d love to share your experience as a guest post.
Lately my life is even more about reading and writing than usual–and let’s be honest, that’s a dream come true. Sometimes people ask why I do so much (full-time magazine editor, freelance writing and editing, teaching, yoga, etc.). But all of these activities tie back in to my greatest loves: reading and writing. Although yoga may not be an obvious connection, it helps me disconnect from the over-active to-do list part of my brain–which in turn leaves me feeling more creative and open to new ideas. It’s a beautiful cycle.
Thanks in part to a schedule made even busier by a number of upcoming book events, I’ve recently started a to-read list (in addition to all of my other lists–did I mention I’m type A?). I’ve got a number of reading and writing assignments due in the coming weeks, and this list has helped me keep my priorities in line. It may seem a bit silly and intense, but it’s working for me.
I wanted to read “The Mockingbird Next Door” by Marja Mills as soon as possible after its release, in large part because of the national conversation regarding whether or not it was written with Harper Lee’s knowledge. (For what it’s worth, I don’t think Mills could have written the book without consent from the Lee sisters.) But I had to finish “The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brene Brown before yoga teacher training (barely made it), and reread “Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone” before my Harry Potter book club met (success).
It’s a different approach to the way I read, but it’s working. And I’m simultaneously being pointed toward other books that I own but have yet to read; for example, in Mills’ book, the Lee sisters talk to her about Paul Hemphill’s “The Ballad of Little River,” among other books that relay Alabama’s history. I love Hemphill’s “Leaving Birmingham,” and own but have yet to read several of his other works.
Between writing my second book (due far too soon!) and powering through my ever-growing reading list, I’ve decided I need to take a two-week vacation: one week to piddle and read whatever I feel like reading, and a second to write, write, write. I’ve got the vacation days, but I’ve got to clear my calendar of events in order to make this dream come to life.
Recently acquired:
The Art of Creative Nonfiction by Lee Gutkind
Nick Saban vs. College Football by Christopher Walsh
Season of Saturdays by Michael Weinreb
Wolf in White Van by John Darnielle
Songbook by Nick Hornby (one of my all-time favorite books in a snazzy new edition)
Muscle Shoals Sound Studio by yours truly
The Hideaway by Lauren K. Denton
The Brewmaster’s Table by Garrett Oliver
The Oxford Companion to Beer edited by Garrett Oliver
The Mockingbird Next Door by Marja Mills
Ottolenghi by Yotam Ottolenghi and Sami Tamimi
Deadline Artists edited by John P. Avlon, Errol Louis and Jesse Angelo
Recently read:
The Mockingbird Next Door by Marja Mills
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by J.K. Rowling
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
This is Where I Leave You by Jonathan Tropper
We Were Liars by E. Lockhart
The Public Library: A Photographic Essay by Robert Dawson
The Leftovers by Tom Perrotta
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This is a repost of a story that originally appeared in the July 2007 issue of Birmingham magazine. Dick Coffee Jr. hasn’t missed an Alabama game since 1946. Hunter Finch tells himself that Auburn players can hear his voice above the din in Jordan-Hare Stadium. UAB graduate Jeremy Harper says the least a fan should do is become a season ticket holder.
