I have a habit that my best friend and I refer to as “making up stories.” (Really, I came up with the term – she just knows what it means.) If I wonder about the nature of something or how something came to be, I’ll theorize about it until I have an explanation that works, in my mind. It doesn’t have to be accurate, mind you – it just needs to satisfy my curiousity.
With that explanation, I have a story I’d like to share with you. 🙂
I’ve noticed something of a trend in the past few years. It’s not clearly defined; there are several categories of gentlemen to whom this theory applies. But, as fuzzy as those defining characteristics are, there’s a definite pattern that has emerged.
Let me elaborate, because I’m certain I’m making little sense.
Guys I’ve dated – these, of course, are those I’ve had an actual relationship with. Only three men fit this category, and they have not all proven the theory correct.
Guys I’ve liked – these fellas are those that I’ve had a crush on, but nothing ever happened between us (for whatever reason). A sub-category here is “guys I thought were really cute and played with the idea of liking, but never developed a full-blown interest in.” (Yes, this is the way my mind works.)
Guys who have asked me out – I think that’s fairly self-explanatory. Because they’re not in the first category, I think it’s fairly obvious that my answer was no.
Now that we’ve cleared that up – let me explain to you the actual theory.
If you fall into one of those three categories, you run the risk of marrying the next woman you date.
Does the title (the theory/the curse/the blessing) now make more sense?
I thought so.
For your consideration, I submit several items of evidence:
Jason – If I had a high school sweetheart, it would’ve been him. Of course, we only dated for three months (that’s as long as it takes for the curse to bestowed upon you!), so that term is completely off. In any case, Jason didn’t date anyone seriously for years. Now he’s dating a girl who was my best friend in high school, and they’re madly in looooooooooooooove. There’s no ring on her finger – yet – but they hope to prove my theory correct.
Jon – Jon’s a category two who (foolishly) refused to believe that I was interested in him. We were close friends until he started dating his fiancee. (Along with picking men who aren’t quite right for me, but are primed for meeting their wives, I have a tendency to befriend men who will drop me after they find a girlfriend. I’m still good friends with Jon’s brother and sister-in-law, though! And I spoke to Jon on the phone a few months ago. That was pretty fun, as well.)
Kevin – Remember that sub-category I threw in? Kevin’s the reason. I never really liked him, but he was a looker and I was intrigued. I wasn’t the only one, either! 😉 There was great mourning among the Crusade girls when he announced his engagement.
Matt – It was a silly crush, but yep, I was interested in Matt for several months. He was so notorious for the way he avoided leading women on that we now will categorize a man as a “Matt ———-” type. When he left for seminary, he started dating a sweet gal he met up there. They’re engaged now, and I don’t think there’s one of us who is surprised.
Benjamin – Have you ever been asked out by someone that was so awesome that you only wished your answer would be yes? That’s how I felt in this situation. I was cheering for him to get together with a friend of mine for months before it happened. Now they’re in looooooooooooove – we’ll see what comes next!
James – My final piece of evidence is also the reason for this entry. Several mornings ago, I received a phone call from my buddy. He had been dating this girl for several months, and he’d told me that engagement was on the horizon. Sure enough, he is now an engaged man! When we discussed the impending exchange of the ring a few weeks prior to the actual event, he both apologized for fulfilling the theory and celebrated that he is, in fact, proving it correct. I bet this category three is glad that I said no. 😉
There are several guys who have slipped through the cracks, of course. I can think of at least… three who are exceptions to this otherwise accurate rule. Of course, one of those has only been free of me for a month, so it’s a bit early to determine whether the curse took hold.
Now fellas, I fully expect flowers and candies arriving at my doorstep. If you wish for me to enact the curse/blessing on you, it’ll take some wooing. 😉
*Some names altered
**This was written with a smile on my face, not with bitterness in my heart. Just so you know. 😉